Pot-Stirrers. Last-Word-Havers. Drama Queens. Thread Hijackers.
There are certainly more ways to describe this type of person, but you get the idea. Doesn’t it seem like no matter where you go or what you’re doing one of them is there? The scary thing is that they’re typically moms fueling the mommy wars. Why is it that when you go out and seek guidance, counsel, friendship, or just a community, someone is always there to be contrary? And boy are they.
Typically, the internet not only fosters these curmudgeons, but motivates an upsurge in their behavior. There is something about the relative anonymity of the internet that makes mommies feel both invincible and free to say hurtful things that bring others down. They feel as though no matter what the subject is, they simply must say everything they feel with no filter or thought for who is receiving their message. They’re right – no matter what. They know what is best for everyone in the world, to include you and yours – even though you’ve never met.
It’s easy to play into it. Feelings get hurt. Toes get stepped on. You have to respond, right? And you might. But then you tire of the back and forth and realize you have to shut it down. But even when you make numerous concerted and obvious efforts to do so, they still have to have the last word. “I’ll stop now.” “But this is what I meant.” “But…” You just have to walk away, ignore, stop commenting.
Lets be clear, if you start a statement with “I’m not trying to be rude,” you FULLY INTEND to be rude. If you feel the need to say “forgive me for saying this,” you DON’T want forgiveness for what you’re going to say. If you say something as stupid as “I’m not picking on you, but” you most certainly ARE picking on someone.
You need your opinion heard – NO MATTER THE COST. If that means hijacking a thread with something that has nothing to do with what you’re on about; hurting someone’s feelings; unnecessarily calling someone to the carpet; or just plain being bitchy, that’s simply what you are.
When other people have to apologize for your behavior, you’ve simply gone too far.