Pot-Stirrers. Last-Word-Havers. Drama Queens. Thread Hijackers.
There are certainly more ways to describe this type of person, but you get the idea. Doesn’t it seem like no matter where you go or what you’re doing one of them is there? The scary thing is that they’re typically moms fueling the mommy wars. Why is it that when you go out and seek guidance, counsel, friendship, or just a community, someone is always there to be contrary? And boy are they.
Typically, the internet not only fosters these curmudgeons, but motivates an upsurge in their behavior. There is something about the relative anonymity of the internet that makes mommies feel both invincible and free to say hurtful things that bring others down. They feel as though no matter what the subject is, they simply must say everything they feel with no filter or thought for who is receiving their message. They’re right – no matter what. They know what is best for everyone in the world, to include you and yours – even though you’ve never met.
It’s easy to play into it. Feelings get hurt. Toes get stepped on. You have to respond, right? And you might. But then you tire of the back and forth and realize you have to shut it down. But even when you make numerous concerted and obvious efforts to do so, they still have to have the last word. “I’ll stop now.” “But this is what I meant.” “But…” You just have to walk away, ignore, stop commenting.
Lets be clear, if you start a statement with “I’m not trying to be rude,” you FULLY INTEND to be rude. If you feel the need to say “forgive me for saying this,” you DON’T want forgiveness for what you’re going to say. If you say something as stupid as “I’m not picking on you, but” you most certainly ARE picking on someone.
You need your opinion heard – NO MATTER THE COST. If that means hijacking a thread with something that has nothing to do with what you’re on about; hurting someone’s feelings; unnecessarily calling someone to the carpet; or just plain being bitchy, that’s simply what you are.
When other people have to apologize for your behavior, you’ve simply gone too far.
We all have one or two, or seven on our friend list. And even though their numbers are small comparatively, they tend to post the most prolifically. Of your 236 friends, “Anti-Everything-Ann” posts the most often, filling your feed with so much rubbish that you never saw your childhood best friend post the pics of her new baby. Every time you open Facebook, there she is, posting about how vaccines cause Autism; global warming is a hoax; and the US Government orchestrated 9-11.
Truthfully, had you known “Anti-Everything-Ann” felt the way she did, you might not have added her as a friend. But now you did, and un-friending her is – well – tantamount to telling her that you hate her. So you go on, and scroll and scroll and scroll until you see things you’re actually interested in. And then you see “Anti-Everyting-Ann” has posted something completely contrary to the things she was posting before.
Not unlike hookers, professional Facebookers will also sell themselves to the highest bidder. Ever notice that the most politically charged, morally superior folks tend to pull a John McCain every 4 years or so? They’re the GOP of Facebook. No matter who is in the White House – they hate them; no matter if we are at war or peace – they think we made the wrong decision; they want to carry their sniper rifles into Costco – but suddenly hate the NRA the second there is a mass shooting. You know the type…they believe their kid was disabled by vaccines – the biggest government conspiracy of all time. But you better believe they expect that same government to provide them free health care.
The thing is, you simply cannot enter into a debate with the Professional Facebooker. After all, they spend all of their waking hours researching (read Googling) and posting what they find on Facebook. Clearly they are EXPERTS in their chosen field. Any comment on their post is an invitation to argue. And the fact is – that’s what they want. They want to prove they know everything there is to know about this issue, and you are ignorant to think otherwise. Ever notice that the best Professional Facebookers are actually the least educated and/or experienced people you know? You think you remember “Anti-Everything-Anne” graduating from high school, but then you remember that development during senior year…maybe she got her GED, let’s give her that much. But really, we’re talking about individuals with ZERO education beyond high school debating issues against folks with advanced degrees in their scientific field of study!
All this time I was seeking answers, you had a degree in Facebook!
I saw the OPM notification come through around 1:30 this morning. Didn’t make a difference to us. My husband never stopped working. He did stop getting paid to work, though. As I lay there in bed, I wondered if the government would decide to pay it’s employees for the more than two weeks of shutdown. Back in the 1990’s, they paid everyone retroactively. EVERYONE. They paid the “essential” people who continued to work during the shutdown, and they also paid the people who didn’t go to work. That doesn’t seem very fair, does it? Don’t get me wrong, I think this whole situation is a pile of dog poo and nobody deserved to be furloughed and not paid. But shouldn’t the priority be the folks who have been working, and working extra shifts, at that? If those who didn’t work get paid, isn’t that tantamount to a two-week paid vacation? Without any loss of leave? So those folks can then take another paid vacation? Those individuals were legally allowed to file for unemployment, or even get another job. My husband could do neither because he still had to go to work. So the time that could have been spent earning additional income, fixing up something around the house, or just enjoying the family, was not given to us.
Trust me, I’m not in any way complaining about the furloughed workers. Nor am I stating they shouldn’t get paid at all. What I am hoping for is a priority level when the government decides on payment and funds. If there is not enough money to pay everyone, how about we pay those who were forced to keep working?